I want you to see me beyond the hair
The flesh, the curves, the lips
The pedicures, the clothes
All the artificial shit.
I want to be naked and raw
And nude and undressed
But for you to look at me
And see something more than sex.
Can I be with you?- not your family
Your friends, the past, the negativity?
The shit that makes me wanna slash the tires
On your Camry?
Cause I don’t wanna call thirty-seven times
Leave thirty-seven voicemails
With thirty-seven personalities
And thirty-six said “Go to Hell!”
I just wanna be.
Left alone or coupled or yours or someone new’s.
Because if you still can’t love me
What do you want me to do?
Live a half-truth to satisfy you?
Suppress half of me to make you whole despite my unhappiness?
It’s like… you just can’t stand who I am
But be damned if I’m someone else!
So stay and let me be me or leave and let me be free.
Cause we’ve been through this a dozen times
And I’ve written at least a dozen poems
And I’ve dated again- a dozen signs
But a dozen times I’ve come home.
A dozen times we’ve reconciled
And a dozen times I’ve been exposed this way
But 11 times you’ve been too insecure
So will the dozenth time be the same?